Friday, April 1, 2011

April's Fool.

Days are just days until they become weeks and months and before you know it the year is over and you start a new one. It’s already April and I feel it was just yesterday that I was celebrating this New Year. This year that has been full of events since day one.

But this year for me seems to be as bad as the one before it. And situations keep happening, the days end, the weeks end, the months end, the years end, but the situations don’t seem to have an end.

Lately I’ve experienced the feeling of not trusting other people; I’ve felt anger, frustration, disappointment and just sadness. My happy days were outlined, limited and short.

The funny thing is I was going through an old notebook, looking for something when I stumbled upon something I wrote in the late August of 2010.

“How much can you share with someone? But first, how far can you trust someone? Or, can you even trust people to the extent they are your best friends, the ones you share with almost anything and everything?

When you have a best friend you’d think you passed this state of questioning yourself about trusting them. But people change, days twist and situations happen. Unexpected things happen and it changes us forever”

What’s ironic is that I wrote this long ago, with no intention to question the trust I have for my best friends, but what happened recently unfortunately makes such a thing I wrote soo true.

We lie to everyone including ourselves. We think everything is fine, when it just isn’t. We have masks, masks that have hidden and destroyed our original face that at some point we don’t recognize ourselves.

I just hope that in the path of finding ourselves again and losing these masks, we don’t ruin others. Because I’ve seen people who are willing to go soo far to get whatever they want done.

Current state of mind: Letting Go Forever.


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